LETTERS TO THE POOP EDITOR

Dear Poop Editor,

I read your last article about dogs piloting flying saucers in the future.  This news is very interesting to me.  I would like to have my head frozen in a Cryogenics lab so I can come back to life in the future and fly these marvelous, marvelous saucer spacecrafts. (The picture in the article is very technical-looking and convincing to me.) I am only a Brussels Griffon mix but I think I could pilot as well as a Sheepdog or a Schnauzer.
Groooowwwwl,
BANANA - THE EDUCATIONAL DOG
P.S. I would like my head sewn onto the body of a Doberman Pinscher when my head is defrosted. Do they do this in a microwave?
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Dear Banana,
Where did you get this crazy information about Cryogenics?  I live with you and I thought I knew you!  How are you writing this to me?  Are you getting on my computer when I'm at work?
Wags and Wiggles,
The Poop Editor
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Dear Poop Editor,
I will not listen to a word you say for I am an Educational Dog. Now I must look up Cryogenics.
Groooowwwwl,
BANANA - THE EDUCATIONAL DOG