LETTERS TO THE POOP EDITOR:

Dear Poop Editor,
I still want to get my head frozen in a Cryogenics lab.  Maybe I can come back as Benjamin Franklin, being that he is as educational as I am.  
Barkingly,
BANANA-THE EDUCATIONAL DOG
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Dear Banana,
Benjamin Franklin is from the past.  Cryogenics (if it really works) works to preserve your head for the future.  How can you say that you are "educational" if you do not know that?  
Wags and Wiggles,
The Poop Editor
-----------------------------------------------------------------Dear Poop Editor,
I will not listen to a word you say.  Please excuse me while I read an exciting book on Astro Physics.
Barkingly,
BANANA-THE EDUCATIONAL DOG