DOGS OF ANCIENT HISTORY (EGYPTIAN DOGS!)

THE RIDDLE OF THE SPHINX

     Several thousand years ago, a traveler (who was really thirsty and weary from traveling) happened upon the Great Sphinx, as he crawled through the unforgiving deserts of Egypt.  The startled traveler was quite shocked to hear a deep, booming voice thundering from the mighty creature as it guarded the pyramids.

     “Get up on your feet,” roared the Sphinx.  “Are you not a being who is cursed to walk the Earth upon two legs?”

     “Huh?”  The traveler was tongue-tied.

     “Get up on your feet, foolish human, and answer me this riddle.”  The Sphinx really meant business!  “If you fail to give me the correct answer, I shall eat you alive like a delicious, little turkey giblet.”  Absolutely terrified by the verbal attack of such a ridiculously large animal, the traveler scuttled to his feet and stood at attention.  “Very good,” observed the Sphinx.  “Now here is my riddle: What wiggles it’s butt in the morning, sleeps in the afternoon, and wiggles it’s butt again in the evening?”

     The traveler panicked.  “How can you expect me to answer such a strange and curious question when I suffer from thirst and exhaustion…and am too petrified for my own life to solve this befuddling puzzle?”

     A gasp of annoyance exited the Sphinx’s enormous mouth.  “Okay, how ‘bout this riddle?  What goes ‘Bark!  Bark! And loves squeaky toys?”

     White with fear, the traveler’s face dripped with cold, salty sweat.  “This is the ‘Before Christ’ Era—B.C.  I do not know what a squeaky toy is!”

     “You repulsive human!” bellowed the Sphinx in a vicious rage.  “Why will you not play my game with me?  I will give you one more chance to save your pitiful life.  All these riddles are so easy and they all have the same answer.  Fine, here is my last riddle or you shall be my supper: What am I?"  The Sphinx wagged his tail.

     A smile of relief appeared upon the traveler’s face.  “Yes, I know that one.  You are a lion, O’ Sphinx.”

     “Noooooo!  Great Dane of Great Danes, how can you humans be so stupid?”  And with that, the powerful Sphinx picked the teeny tiny traveler up in it’s massive jaws and gobbled him up like a tasty, little turkey giblet.

    There will be many who read this story and become perplexed and baffled.  Wasn’t the mighty Sphinx a lion with the head of a Pharaoh and the wings of a great bird?  No, not at all.  It was a large working dog in a fancy costume to appear grand and menacing.  Pictured above is a scientist’s rendering of the Sphinx relaxing during a lunch break in his shift.  By evening, (remember, this was before electricity and outside lighting), he clocked out and went home.  And yes, like all dogs, he wiggled his tail and even his butt at the end of the night.